This week, I'm reminded (by my counselor husband and a coach-ee) that healthy relationships don't "just happen;" they are intentional.
For example, when Roger teaches pre-marital couples about love, he warns them that before marriage, you naturally want to do something for the one you love. After marriage, you must be intentional.
Intentional means...on purpose or deliberate.
When you love someone, you can get lazy or take them for granted. When you love someone you can begin to speak abruptly to them (or at least in a manner or tone that you would not use with a neighbor or coworker).
Lovers who are mature can more easily move from natural (what comes easy) to intentional (deliberate) IF they operate out of obedience to God rather than in response to their emotions or impulses.
In closing, consider these powerful verses from the Old Testament.
Isaiah 32:8, "A noble man makes noble plans and by noble deeds He stands."
Proverbs 1:32, "The complacency of fools will destroy them."
Be encouraged,
Becky
I usually choose a word of the year and pass everything through that prism. Several years ago it was Intentional I was surprised what an effect it had on everything. Intentional is such a good word. One small example, I didn't buy anything that wasn't on my list (intentional). I became a planner (something I don't do well). The list of benefits for being intentional goes on and on. Look forward to the call.
ReplyDeleteThank you! for this practical way of applying and working out an action.
ReplyDeleteQ's=Question yourself.
"Intent" also comes to my mind.... what do you intend to do? Q's...as you start the day and Q's as you finish your day.
Daily Q's
I intend to:
show LOVE to my family by smiling first then talking.
I'm going to have to work on this one.
ReplyDeleteI need to give the gift of prayer to those in my family, and I need to devote much more time to that. I always intend to pray for them every day, and then I miss a day or two or three.
Intentional giving of prayer.
Intentional loving. Sounds powerful doesn't it. Mickey, I like putting on a smile first- sets the tone of what follows. Laura, no better gift than praying.
ReplyDeleteCurrently, I am working on a budget for the month of December. This is my husbands love language. Having an appreciation for him being a provider. My haphazard approach to money isn't intentional loving so I am changing. I am putting on a smile and saying a prayer.
I have a spending plan and an accountability partner.
Becky,I think this word has been a huge part of the success you have taught our group in relation to all that we have learned over several years of following your blog. For example, I have learned to be very intentional about setting time for exercise, planning and praying. I have had several surgical procedures this past month and have had to stop exercising until cleared by the surgeon. This has been hard and I do not feel as well as I usually do - tight, slug like, yuck...because I have been doing it for so long. Also, I have already purchased a new calendar for next year and I love looking ahead...all these things you have taught me! I have also looked forward to my time alone with God, intentional and so rewarding. Now, as far as intentionally loving my husband, I think I do. Right now, it is really hard for me. I am seeking help (counsel) in this. I guess that is accountability. The rest of my family, yes. I am guessing that our relationship would be a challenge to Roger. I heard this the other day from Joyce Meyer: "God will take our mess, and make it our message." love that!
ReplyDeleteIt keeps me going, no He keeps me going!